210 September 13986 - Ooops another one just happened

Well, you're just bubbling along one day and thinking that with a little more effort things might just work out OK. Your misfortunes seem to be coming to an end. Perhaps you might even start to really enjoy life in a deep and meaningful kind of way... Just at that moment, you realise that you've drifted off asleep at the wheel of your car. Your choice is simply whether to crash into a tree at a slower or faster speed.... That sums up the way a dog feels when a new baby comes home. You're caught asleep at the end of the chain with only a drop before you.

Now I don't want to depress the kiddies (so if you're under 18 please do not read any further, but instead think about bunny rabbits, unicorns and rainbows like polite children should). However, if you're over 18, let's talk about tension, distress and potentially cancerous polyps.

Elliot and I seemed to be getting on reasonably well. The odd lick and pat I calmly accepted - at least his oral hygiene was far better than Ellie's. Elliot even seemed to be taking a bit of a fixation to Ellie - he even chased her around the yard this morning trying to hit her with his hand shovel (then later with a stick). Now, you have to excuse Young Master Elliot, since Ellie really does deserve a good thrashing, but poor Rogedog is another thing altogether. Sure he enjoys the odd escape, possum and alternative music concert, but he's a good dog at heart.

The insurgence of the brand new Felix Emmett into the Latham household is sad day for Rogedog indeed ....

For those of you who enjoy being miserable, the details of the new baby are:

• Felix Emmett
• 7 Pounds 10 Ounces (3455g for the non-Americans out there)
• 53cm long
• 34cm around his noggin
• Birthday 9:05am 21/9

The only good that I can see arising from the new baby , is that it secures the male bias in the household:

Master Craig/Roge/Elliot/Felix v. Mistress Liz/Stupid Ellie

Ascendency has been attained. We're actually thinking about getting a pool table, darts board, bar and a home theatre system (it will be an updated version of that famous artwork "Dogs Playing Pool" except with only one dog, a master and a couple of babies - actually it may differ a bit from the original artwork - I'd also prefer it in velour anyway). If it comes to the vote, we know that we have the numbers. The only difficulty is that Master Craig appears to have become a little unstable. Elliot caught this recent photo of him:

If Master Craig does become mentally defective, the male margin is not so good. This is why I'm trying to get him to sign a Power of Attorney that authorises me to step into his shoes upon his mental demise. Remember that if Mistress Liz first secures this authority that the genders will be locked (with Master Craig effectively becoming female). There is also scope for her to place undue influence on the younger boys to vote her way. Of course, we'd all like to see Master Craig to continue as he is, but it would be stupid of me to sit idly by whilst his world becomes a smudge of colours and voices telling him to commit lewd and unseasonal acts.

At the moment, I suspect that Master Craig may be regressing to "kinder times". there have been a few hints:

• He's put up a poster of "Punky Brewster" on his side of the bed
• He's currently typing lecture notes on a Commodore 64
• He told some of the kids at Church that they need to see A-Ha's "Take on Me" to fully understand modern music videos
• He wears his sunglasses all day (even at night)
• He keeps saying that it's not "comma, comma, comma" it's "karma"
• He's writing "The Breakfast Club 2" in his spare time
• When someone metions Jennifer Beals, he doesn't say "Who?"
• Apparently, he knows whose number is 867-5309
• He still watches things on Beta
• He wants to change his name to Rio and dance on the sand
• He's practising getting into and out of the car through the windows
• He has a tendency to turn up the collar of his polo shirts
• He wears pastel and fluorescent clothes to work
• He just wants to shout, shout, let it all out
• He's planning a dream vacation to Mepos
• People are constantly gagging him with spoons
• Whenever we watch watch NYPD Blue, he says "Well, they're no Crockett and Tubbs, that's for sure."

It may only days before Elliot, Felix and I are left to order the pool table ourselves!

Well, better get off to that old mailbox:

Hi fellow K-9's

It has been so long that April and I have forgotten how to use the key
board.  Fall is approaching here in Ohio.  Both of us spent the summer
laying around in the yard and watching the masters son and friends play
baseball.  Laurie, Chris's sister spent the summer watching our masters
brothers, son and daughter.  "Say that fast several times."  This was
great since we got some great lunches when they pushed the dishes off
the high chairs.  Also we found that kids around eleven years old don't
like the crust form their sandwiches.  Lunches were good! But school has
started and we stay at home alone all day.  The only snacks we get is
when Chris as a snack after school. However, there is not enough there
to satisfy our hunger.  

Other events that took place some new dogs moved into the area.  I keep
going thru continuing education classes on staying in the yard, don't
follow other dogs, plus the old come, sit and stay exersize program.

We hope to write more often now that the computers are used for evening
homework assignments.  

Bear and April from Ohio

Yes - time flies by pretty quickly.... It's now our turn to spend the summer laying around in the yard and watching the master's sons and friends play cricket.

As for sandwiches, I prefer to sample entire sandwiches (not just crusts). You can accomplish this by going to school and waiting until bags are left unattended. I was recently caught in a sting operation by the local pound in this very scheme.

Hi Rogernald Dogue!

My name is Mo Mo. I'm a one year old Shih Tzu. I have 
my own web page.
I'll support you until you get a outdoor connection!

-Mo Mo

Thanks Mo Mo for your support! I suspect that we may also need your support for the home theatre system....

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Take me to the next diary entry or show me the complete calendar!

I'd be very happy if you'd sign Master Craig's visitors' book before you leave (he won't create one for me).

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